Cone of Silence, Please

As far as I can tell thus far, surviving two kids under two is all about coordination. It’s a constant juggling act. Making sure they’re both alive is the first task. Making sure they’re happy is the second. The third: making sure you and your partner happy.

tumblr_nnbv6gysan1urf1kao1_500The thing is, don’t count on achieving all three things, especially #3. Because your toddler is probably just about to enter the crazy-spastic-wildebeest stage and will likely get more uncontrollable as time progresses.

What would make this momma happy is to get the newborn on a schedule. Help the poor little guy get in one damn uninterrupted nap a day. But the crazy-spastic-wildebeest toddler does not understand what volume is, and let’s be honest, if he did, he’d probably scream at the top of his lungs nonstop.

Open floor plans are beautiful and fancy. I love the flow, the ability to see my brood in almost every room – but thanks to it’s hip design, silencing said wildebeest is 100% impossible.

getsmart-coneofsilence

My husband and I joke that we’d pay a gajillion for someone to invent a cone of silence that would protect our poor little one from the high-pitched squeals of the wildebeest.

Since none of you have manned-up and invented such a device we are constantly on whisper alert, trying to muffle sounds of cats, bigger children, and a klutzy husband.

Sigh. I think silence is a luxury we will not be able to afford for a few years.

 

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